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Jennifer's Lapdog John Watches the Interview
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| Look Pastor Smiley. It's Jennifer on the Today Show with Katie Cupcake. Oh, I just love my little bug-eyed Jennipooh. Praise the Lord. Jenn, tell us about the bad people! | |
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| Let us pray. Dear God, thank you for returning precious pampered pedicured Jennifer to us. Help us understand the life or death decisions a common criminal is faced with on her wedding eve. | |
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| Jennifer let's get started. Was the hotel comfy? Did you enjoy the harbor tour? Do your eyes bother you? How was dinner last night? How do you like our weather? Tell us about your ORDEAL. | |
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| Oh, Katie. Everything was just peachy. I'm a pretend Georgia peach, ya know. Now, about my ORDEAL. First she climbed over my head, beep, beep. Then he took off my pants beep, beep. Then he was... | |
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| Jennifer, Jennifer, sweetie. This is daytime programming. Kids are eating breakfast. You really shouldn't talk like that. Please, let's start again. | |
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| OK Katie. My "stupid issues" must be controlling me. I'll start again. John loves smut. Well, first she climbed over my head, beep, beep. Then he took off my pants beep, beep. Then he was... | |
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