Frozenfire  

Your eyes sparkle like the brightest stars in the night sky.

Your abs ripple like the waves in the ocean.

Hold it! Nobody wants to read this kind of romantic shit in my comics. So I've taken the liberties of writing their next lines myself.

What the fuck are you doing in here, bitch? Get in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

I have no independent thoughts of my own. I am merely here to serve my master Brendan. He touches me in naughty places.