All comics by Offsprung

 

by Offsprung
5-11-03
A very hungover Reginald wakes up after passing out behind a 7-11...
Where the hell am I?
Reginald...I am your Lord and savior. You are at the gates to Paradise.
Oh! Kick ass. I heard heaven was the shit.
Yeah! Heaven fuckin' rocks...Ahem. I mean, Reginald, I am here to judge you. Your entrance into Paradise is not guranteed at this time.
Oh great. Now he's going to find out about that time I was drunk and my uncle came over with a coke bottle and...

 

by Offsprung
5-11-03
We now return back to our hero...
That's disgusting, but alas, I already know.
Holy shit! You can read my mind!
Good observation, twat. Now back to business. Let's see...you've broken about every commandment except one. So, why don't you kill people?
Let's just say that I'm too drunk to kill people most of the time.
Well that' good. So anyway, I'm pretty forgiving. I guess I will let you slide. Come on in.
Woo Hoo! I can't wait to fuck one of them holy bitches!

 

by Offsprung
5-11-03
What? Is that the only reason you want up here? Fuck you then. You can go fuck one of the sinner bitches in hell. Get the fuck out of here.
Screw you then, asshole! You can tell Moses that he can eat shit!
In hell...
Well this isn't too bad! At least it's warm! So...Where are the bitches?!
Here I am, beefcake!
The End
Fuck. Oh well...at least you have a big mouth! So tell me...can you deep throat?
You bet your sweet ass I can! I took lessons from Mamma Cass!

 

by Offsprung
5-11-03
Who the fuck are you?
I'm a robot, you Mong. Now you will serve me or you will face your demise!
What the hell are you gonna do? You don't even have any genitals...
Your right! Where the fuck is my package?! Wait, wait, wait...Your trying to psych me out! Fuck that! I am done with your insolence. Prepare to meet your doom!
What the fuck? You turned me into Val Kilmer???
That's right, bitch. See if 'Maverick' or 'Goose' have your back NOW, you fucking has-been.

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