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| With earth heating up and everything, something had to be done. | |
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| And then I remembered that old movie where a guy plays chess with Death. | |
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| So I challenged a personification of Global Warming to a game, winner take all. | |
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| Little did he know, I was a Grandmaster. After 20 moves I was up a knight and a pawn. I had him on the ropes. | |
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| So what the heck happened? | |
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| He just grinned, and next thing I know, there were puddles of liquid plastic where all my pieces had been. | |
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