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No, Lenny, darling, you're right. I shouldn't have spent so much time with Ben and Jerry.

I know, darling, I know. I followed you around, jealous of your attention. I watched you bend over the counter, eyeing their wares with those bright eyes.

But how could I not, with Rocky Road in front of me? I always cried when I laid eyes on my favourite Chubby Hubby.

How could I not despair when I saw you licking Cherry Garcia with such delight? Or studying for Karamel Sutra? Each lick stung my sunken, shattered pride.

You know I had Everything But The --

-- adulation and love of your spouse. Oh, Virginia! Forgive me!