quodlibet  

You'll be glad to know that things turned out all right in the end, this year.

After Santa betrayed me to the thought-police, Mom bailed me out of jail and hushed up the criminal charges.

Then she beat the shit out of me for failing to topple the Christmas regime once again. "If you're going to do it, do it right!" she screamed at me.

If that's not the meaning of Christmas, I don't know what is.