Thank you, my friend...but praise me not, for I am but a simple man.
I was born on a mountain top in Tennessee. I learned to fend for myself in the harsh wilds, as my mother was a godless Jezebelle who abandoned me as soon as my feet had passed her much used loins. I built a lean-to shelter out of honey suckle vines and wild pig manure, taking all of the strength I had in my newborn fists to do so.
I suckled at the teet of a wanderin' coyot' til I was three months old, then I struck out on my own, with nothin' but a well worn copy of Walden, and a belly full of warm coyot' milk and gravel.
What is there to say about me? --I'm a man of the Earth. I enjoy the company of a fine dog and a woman with wide birthin' hips who can fix up a mess of biscuits from scratch.
A superstar?... 'fraid not. I keep to myself, and just take life as it comes.
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Have you ever noticed how Massachusetts looks like a drunk Possum passed out against a dumpster?