It had to be done.

There's really only one rule. The basis for the joke has to be based on Pokémon. Do another episode-in-three-panels thing, overload it with lame puns, critique its influence on post-industrial literature. Whatever. Just make with the funny.

And yes, I know, there's not much in the way of yellow in the strips. You still have to keep it out of photoshop. That's the challenge. ;-) That pissant yellow rat isn't worth a joke anyway.

I'm sorry. Really. I am.

The contest is due Tuesday the 21st at noon EST.

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"I'm gonna give you cancer." "...what are you, a cellphone?"

Yes. I realize I gave you 5 days to do this.

Yes. I realize contests usually run 3 days.

Yes. I realize 5 days might be a bit much.

No. I wasn't thinking when I came up with that figure.

If you do good enough, I may shorten it to Monday/4 days.

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"I'm gonna give you cancer." "...what are you, a cellphone?"

CC54: Comic Strippermon by Drexle 8-16-01

For honor and justice... and to win the eight badges... Crabbymon, I choose you!!! CRABBYMON!!! WASH AT WASH AND WASH!!! PEDANTIC!!!! Oh yeah, well your crabbymon is no match for my Pedantomon!!! Now's our chance to grab that_Crabbymon!!!! To protect the world from devastation! To unite all people within our nation!

For some reason my last sentence got cut off by 6 words, but at least the gist of the punchline is there.

The (de)Evolution of Pokemon by NastyPope 8-16-01

Hey Craig, did you bring your pokemon cards ? No, pokemon is for kids, I found something much cooler. Cooler than pokemon ? No Way!!! What is it ? It's Felchimon, where fantastic creatures and robots try to sodomize each other or be felched. Wow, that sounds cool, show me how it works!!!! Allright, if you insist, but since you dont have a Felchimon to protect you, this is going to burn a bit. TOBOR

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At least im still funny .....looking. http://www.carrionfields.com

So I go to lunch and two folks "steal" my idea of comicmon. So I guess it's on to Plan B, and start the lame pun bandwagon!

The Jamaican Bobsledders: Where are they now? by kaufman 8-16-01

One is an undercover policeman in Montego Bay. Up against the car! You're going to the pokey, mon! Two are Jamaica's answer to Siskel & Ebert. I give The Gumby Movie a big thumbs down. I thought it was boring and juvenile. So did I, but I found it to be an extraordinary performance by Pokey, mon. And one works as a librarian in Kingston. Where can I find "For Whom the Bell Tolls" and "The Telltale Heart"? I can let you into the Hemingway room, but I lost the Poe key, mon.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

CC54: Bottom-of-the-Barrel-mon... by DexX 8-16-01

In the design office of some toy company or other... How is the new Aluminium Series Pokemon design coming along? Not too well, I am afraid. I think we've milked this one all we can. Well so far we have come up with Phonee and Jamtoe... *BRR-RING!* Sonic dial tone... activate! Launch fungal spores! Oh, and there's Dubyoh, with his bewildering speech, and the mighty Aybabtu... Time to sell my shares in the company, I think...

A half-arsed effort, but the previous round's winner never wins, anyway... *grin*

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

CC 54: A public service announcement from Dr. Help-me-out by BigEvilDan 8-16-01

Pokemon is an insidious force that is corrupting todays youth. To explain further, here is a talking chicken. Thanks Doc. I've created a little demonstration to show Pokemon's destructive influence. This conversation seems innocent enough... Wanna see my Pokeballs? I've got a huge Blastoise and a Doduo. Wow, neat! ...but watch as we change the setting slightly. Wanna see my Pokeballs? I've got a huge Blastoise and a Doduo. Thank God for pepper spray!

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

Generation Gap by Spankling 8-16-01

Pssst... Smelly old man! Will you get me a pack of Pokemon cards? I'll give you $5! Hu? You'll pay me $5 to poke ya? Bend over and show me South Korea, baby! And fork over the fin! WHAT? No you pickled degenerate! I can't buy cards because my mom wont let me. You gotta do it for me! Cards? You wanna play poker? A $5 limit? Kinda steep for me... can we play strip poker instead? Forget it wine-sop! It's the cops! Mommy! Shit! I swear she said she was 18 officer!

Poketheman is not of my time.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

CC 54: Not-so-SmartTalk by BigEvilDan 8-16-01

This is SmartTalk, the weekly discussion panel. Our topic for today is "Pokemon cards: Innocent game or evil ploy?" My mom bought me tons of these cards. They were fun at first, but eventually I just traded them for some beer. These cards are the tool of the Devil! First it's Pokemon cards, then them Magical cards, an' eventually sacrificin' virgins. An' I hate wastin' a perfectly good virgin. You realize that we sell more pack because you say it's "Satan's game" than we ever could normally, right? Hell, I *WISH* this game was my idea. I'd rule the world by now if it were.

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

Apokelypse Now by kaufman 8-16-01

We have defeated all the other Pokemon on earth. We are victorious. Are you sure you took care of Pokemoon? Special power: METEOR! Bonzai!

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

POKECRAP by crabby 8-16-01

I choose you KANGO. I choose you HEADO. Lets do this! What the hell I got no body. AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT...... FLAMING LEFT BOOB! FLAMING RIGHT BOOB!

quote:

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Heado: What the hell I got no body.

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quote:

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quote:

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Heado: What the hell I got no body.

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I dunno...this is a pretty good line.

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After sitting out cc53, I'm back with a vengeance!!

Well, okay, not so much a 'vengeance' as another comic, but you get the idea.

CC54: The Newest Pokemon by descolada99 8-16-01

Oh no some one is trying to get rid of all Pokemon that sucks poke-ass what will I do? Use your strong Pokemon to defeat them you are a great trainer you have many great strong Pokemon! But which to choose I have so many I usually use Pikafuck but that thing got annoying a long time ago who should I choose? Use your newest Pokemon the one you captured yesterday it is not fully trained but very strong I have faith in you! Wirthling! I choose you! Wirth. Wirth. Ling!! Wirth!! Ling!!

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"Fascist Clay was my most favorite totalitarian boxer!" - Indie Rock Pete from Diesel Sweeties

CC54: There's nothing quite so personal as a poke in the bag by boorite 8-17-01

Fukkachu! Electrifried conniption fit attack!! Homina homina homina! Fikki fi fo fi fi fikki fi fukku! Wirthichoad! Wirthering sarcasmic flamestorm attack!! Hideous-transvestite-bunny-buttlove-dot-com! AIIIEEEE! Fuk u fukka!!! Oh no! Wirthichoad has wirthered Fukkachu, my last and favorite Pokemon! I'm all out! What will I do? Hi, I'm here for the "Poke-a-Man" tryouts.

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What others say about boorite!

Knowing nothing about Pokemon, I backgrounded myself by reading some Pokemon fanfic.

I'm going to go drink a bottle of Drano now.

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What others say about boorite!

quote:

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Knowing nothing about Pokemon, I backgrounded myself by reading some Pokemon fanfic.

I'm going to go drink a bottle of Drano now.

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And the second...

CC 54: More Pokémutations by NeoVid 8-17-01

You know that toy you've been asking for? Did you get it? Did you get it? Your father had to search all over, but he managed to get pick one up on his last business trip! It's right outside. YAY! Uh... MOMMY?! Hi! I'm your new polka man! I can dance and do any polka tune ever made! Here, let me get my accordion...

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

I know fuck all about Pokemon, and, frankly; I hope I never do.

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

I'm new! Kick me!

C.C. LIV: From the obscurest chapters of the Pokedex... by habnem 8-18-01

Do you need a new Pokemon? I am Muliato, and I can shoot gouts of antimatter from my ass! Wow! Let's see it! . . .hold on a sec. . . . . . motherFUCKER! Umm... I choose you again, Pikachu.

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- christ@myself.com - fuck a cat, kill yourself - my alter ego has five stars

There's 14 hours left as of this post...if anyone wants to squeeze one last entry in...

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"I'm gonna give you cancer." "...what are you, a cellphone?"

I figured I'd take a whack at this, but I needed to do some research since I know nothing about Pokémon. I found the following information:

quote:

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- It goes to the various towns and the wood, and a PokeMon is made to fight, and collected, and raised, and we complete a PokeMon illustrated book as a sweat shirt of the PokeMon.

- We can fight against the friend's PokeMon by using the telecommunication cable, and we can be exchanged, and it takes charge of us, and we can be brought up.

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But who needs to know the subject when you have a warped imagination...

CC 54: Namblachu by wirthling 8-20-01

Gotta catch 'em all! Gotta catch 'em all! Hey there, little boy! I bet you haven't caught the, uh, Herpesore Pokémon yet, have ya?! Heh heh. Gosh, no, mister! I'd sure love to catch the Herpesore! Follow me into the bushes and I'll share it with ya! Five minutes later... Well, enjoy your Herpesore, little boy! Heh heh. Hey! Where's the Pokémon, cheater?! You're just like that guy who said he'd give me the Aidsvirusapotamus Pokémon, and he ripped me off, too!

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

CC 54: More educational than the WWF! by BigEvilDan 8-20-01

Bondagebird, I choose you! Wait, is this a Pokemon battle or a cock fight? Who the fuck cares? One of them is gonna be fine eatin' tonight.

The connection between these two subjects has always disturbed me...but not as much as the fact that I've submitted three entries to a Pokemon contest.

Please kill me now.

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

quote:

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CC 54: More educational than the WWF! by BigEvilDan 8-20-01

Bondagebird, I choose you! Wait, is this a Pokemon battle or a cock fight? Who the fuck cares? One of them is gonna be fine eatin' tonight.

The connection between these two subjects has always disturbed me...but not as much as the fact that I've submitted three entries to a Pokemon contest.

Please kill me now.

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