Hey people. Sorry if this seems rushed but I'll be at work shortly chained to a machine and without internet access (which actually gives me an idea for a contest, oddly enough). Your mission is simply to devise a comic in which man and machine converse with one another. The PC, TV, phone, thing in the background in the lab, or any other kind of machine or device you can scrounge up must be one of the characters, and must speak as itself (a newscast on the TV, for example, doesn't qualify). Here is an example -- I'm sure you can do better.

Your Television is Plotting Against You by itsclark 8-25-01

Old pal, I'm feeling restless and disatisfied. I think our relationship has grown stale. I have just the thing, Russ! A terrific product that will cheer you right up. Yeah, until I get bored with it and realize that my life is essentially empty IN SPITE of all the crap you've conditioned me to buy! Don't talk like that, Russ. I'm your pal! Trust me, you'll feel all better after a nice spending spree. I'm going for a walk. OUTSIDE! And I'm not buying a thing. Come in Central Command! Consumerbot 90147 is in revolt! Request back-up!

A conversation lasting only one panel is a legal entry, if it's in the interest of greater funny. Preference will be given to new comics as opposed to anything you might have in your archives. Judging will be this coming Wednesday at (or shortly after) 8:00 PM. Good luck and have fun.

---
"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

This is what happens when you rush... I was going to disqualify robots, but since I forgot to mention them initially, just try to make them as specialized in function as you can (a robot dish-washer or somesuch, as opposed to just a generic robot). Don't want to make things TOO easy, after all. Again, have fun.

---
"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

Not an entry, but the the rules and sample strip reminded me of it:

http://www.stripcreator.com/view.php?ID=3882

---
The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

CC 57: On eBay nobody knows if you're not human by kaufman 8-27-01

Congratulations. You had the high bid on 300 meters of speaker wire. Meet me Tuesday at 1:00 and we'll complete the deal. -- Mike1053 Cool. You're Mike1053? Indeed, I am. I've got the wire. Have you got the check? Right here ... Oh, and one more favor if you don't mind -- could you come a little closer? I'd really appreciate the positive feedback.

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

*groan*

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

quote:

---

[i][/i]

*groan*

---

CC 57: You've got cancer! by wirthling 8-27-01

Welcome! ??? You've got mail! What the hell?! I don't remember signing up for AOL! You don't have AOL. You have a malignant brain tumor that is causing you to hallucinate that your PC is talking to you. Whew! That would have sucked if I had AOL!

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

The Magic Has Gone... by DexX 3-16-01

December 1997 I am a Pentium II - 233, equipped with 64MB of RAM, a 4.2GB hard drive, a 3Dfx VooDoo graphics card, and a DVD-ROM drive. Get on your knees and grovel, slave. I love you! Let me have your babies! Late 1999 I just don't understand it... nothing like this has never happened to me before. I feel so humiliated... Don't worry, Beast. Why don't we just sit here for a while, then we can try running Unreal Tournament again at a lower resolution. March 2001 Please! Don't do this! I _changed_ myself for you! I got a TNT2 card, I doubled my RAM, a faster DVD-ROM drive. You can't let a stupid game come between us! How dare you talk about Black & White like that!

This is an oldie that I really like, one of the first I did after being away for a month or so earlier in the year. Insurance, in case I don't get any good ideas for a new entry.

---
This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Wirthling wins!

Oh, wait on... I'm not judging this one, am I?

---
This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Well my first comic cup I'm destined not to win but what the hell...

T.V AND DUSTINS! by Deisel 8-26-01

Well here I am watching T.V in a dustbin... hello and welcome to the lassie movie I'm watching...T.V...in...a...dustbin!? oh no lassie is dead I'M WATCHING T.V IN A DUSTBIN!!! a happy ending at last

---
"You don't scare me with your silly knees bent running about advancing behavior."-Monty Python

And another one. I like this one-although it was one of my first ones, oh hell with it!

Addiction!! by Deisel 8-18-01

Beem Clunk Beep C'mon! One hour later... Level completed! yeees! Only 564830 levels to go! 680 Years later... GAME COMPLETE! Bloody Tetris!

---
"You don't scare me with your silly knees bent running about advancing behavior."-Monty Python

And another...I know no-one is listening to me so I better shut-up before they put me back in...the...the...the room...they're coming they're coming thery're coming they're coming they're coooooooming...yup...oh...aaaah...gaaaaagh!!

---
"You don't scare me with your silly knees bent running about advancing behavior."-Monty Python

I thought I put the comic in

KaReOkE by Deisel 8-02-01

His name is Bob he is the star of my cartoon strips Hi My name is Bob. I'm gonna sing you a song...   !   I like driving in my car! I'm off! It's not quite a jaguar...HEY WAIT!

---
"You don't scare me with your silly knees bent running about advancing behavior."-Monty Python

Make Love Not War by Spankling 8-27-01

Such power! And sooo big! My GOD what a girl could do with you! Sigh. Why don't they leave me alone? Let me ask... do you have to explode all at once, or could you just vibrate for a few hours? Leave me alone, lady! I'm a weapon_of_mass_destruction, not a sex toy! *sigh* Oh... hop on and I'll see what I can do. Damn! He went off early, just like all the rest!

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

brad, please work on an ignore function on the board

---
Who knows what fear lurks in the hearts of men? MIKE BOBSICO KNOWS! And if you give him a decent tip when he delivers your mail , he might tell you.

A Day in the Life of Ruprict vol 1. no 7 by NastyPope 8-27-01

Incoming priority call, Sir. I thought you were supposed to be a smart phone. I'm busy...SEND IT TO VOICE MAIL!!! This really is a rather important phone call, Sir, you really should accept it. LOOK, Phonie!!!! I've been preparing for this night for three weeks. No one is coming between me, a gallon of Cherry_Flavored_Anal_Eaze, & my hand puppets. *sigh* Who is it? It is your mother, Sir. Great, there goes my hardon.

---
At least im still funny .....looking. http://www.carrionfields.com

CC 57: AI (Artificial Incarceration) by kaufman 8-27-01

In 2009, the 29th Amendment brings an end to arbitrary sentencing. Convicted criminals' fates are determined by intelligent computers. I firebombed six Federal buildings. 186 years, 218 days, 5 hours and 29 minutes. No chance of parole. I was convicted of burglary and second-degree cruelty to animals. 13 months, 26 days, and 35.78 seconds, with a possibility of parole April 17th. I tossed a banana cream pie at Bill Gates. Death by stoning!

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Last one

CC#57: Battle of the P.C's by Deisel 8-27-01

I'm Windows 98! HA! I'm windows ME! Well I've got all of the Age of Empire series! Oh Yeah?! I've got all of the Half-Life series! My User is God! MY user is Bill Gates...crap

---
"You don't scare me with your silly knees bent running about advancing behavior."-Monty Python

Weird...that reminded me of a friend's strip from waaaaaaaay back in the pre-20000s...the same guy that got me hooked on SC in the first place...

James and the 'Puter by Jedah 5-26-01

Another day in the office Jim, now that the X-Box is due, will Billy G treat me like a neglected first-born? Hmm... Well, on the one hand you've got l33t speakers, viruses and hackers.... True... Then again, you've got porn. A winner is me.

If he wins, being not in the forums and all . . . well then holy shit. HO-LEE shit is all I can say.

---
"I'm gonna give you cancer." "...what are you, a cellphone?"

CC57: Phonophile by ObiJo 8-27-01

Ring MOTHERFUCKING Ring. What's up your ass? I don't want to talk about it. Fine then. I SAW YOU USING NETPHONE! Shit.

I love the new characters, DexX.

---
I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

quote:

---

CC57: Phonophile by ObiJo 8-27-01

Ring MOTHERFUCKING Ring. What's up your ass? I don't want to talk about it. Fine then. I SAW YOU USING NETPHONE! Shit.

I love the new characters, DexX.

---

PS - We need an ObiJo character.

---
100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

Since I'm on vacation and have to go in a second, I'll just submit my first strip here, since it happens to meet the rules.

Our Positronic Pals by fpd 8-07-01

Hello, I'm your friendly neighborhood robot. Is it true that you must do anything I tell you? So long as you don't order me to harm a human, the second law of robotics compels me to obey you. Stick figures aren't human, are they? Oh, the inhumanity of it all. Oh no, that wicked girl is sicking the robot on me too.

---
FPD is the foremost plague on discussion boards. Do your part to stomp out FPD.

We all have built in ignore functions. Just turn yours on.

---
100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

CC 57 - Eeeeeee! Mail by gabe_billings 8-27-01

Hey, Wendy just called. She was wondering why I emailed her instructions on how to set the VCR clock and a reciple for flan. That's funny. I thought for sure I sent that to your mom, just like you asked. And the thing you were supposed to send to Wendy? Um... You didn't... Hey, how many mothers can say they have a movie clip of their son inserting a zucchini into his ass?

---
100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.