Forum archives » Read My Damn Comics » Prologues and The first Strangely Ordinary...

word_weaver13
April 4, 2004 12:23 PM

Now, these may not be horribly funny, but bare with me. Still working out how to make them funnier.

221170

221172

221284

Yeah, so if you don't like them...at least don't throw rotten fruit!!

Post #131093link

biped
April 4, 2004 1:19 PM

LOOP's first mission: Lexy

First and second panels: Why do Lexy and Victor appear as a miniature clown, chicken, and/or robot? Is this an oversight, or do they possess some sort of shape-shifting powers that were not mentioned in the story? If so, why did they join the LOOP instead of the Legion of Super-Heroes, where their incredible powers could have been put to much better use in the service and protection of humanity? Did Superman veto their induction into this group, and, if so, what did they do to piss-off Superman?

Third panel: If they are supposed to be in Iraq, why is the "Stop" sign printed in English? This sort of inattention to detail can be confusing, and is likely to negatively affect the reader's first impression of the comic. I, of course, had no problem with it, but you must take into consideration the fact that everyone else is stupider than I am.

LOOP's first mission: Victor

The punchline is very good. But again, there are problems with the presentation. Where are the Whopper and fries? Are they invisible? If so, this should have been explained in a prologue, or perhaps somewhere in the dialogue contained in panels one or two (as in, "Here's your invisible Whopper, sir.")

Strangely Ordinary #1

First of all, the line "I can't believe they gave me such a hard one" would have been much funnier if it had read, "I can't believe they gave me such a hard-on." As for the story, I found myself unable to concentrate on it due to the fact that the old-style rotary phone is apparently serving as a speaker phone, which, of course, is a glaring anachronism. This, too, could have been avoided with the proper prologue, such as: "The speaker phone is intentionally retro-designed to look like a rotary phone. And now, on with the story."

In spite of these major innaccuracies, inconsistencies, and wasted opportunites, however, I found the comics enjoyable.

Post #131095link

word_weaver13
April 4, 2004 2:06 PM

LOL

Well, I have to say, some of those details have to be overlooked due to the fact that only 2 characters and/or props are allowed per frame. ((hint hint, stripcreator...)) As for the "hard-on" thing, yes that would have been better.

Thanks for your comment and feedback, lol. I'm sure it will prove helpful...

Post #131100link

Forum archives » Read My Damn Comics » Prologues and The first Strangely Ordinary...

stripcreator
Make a comic
Forums
featuring
diesel sweeties
jerkcity
exploding dog
goats
ko fight club
penny arcade
chopping block
also
Brad Sucks