CC 58: Pick your poison...

[list=1][*]Make a comic conforming to at least one of the following three rules:
[list=a][*]Use no characters or props (exception: the height props may be used).
[*]Use no dialogue. Only thought bubbles and/or narration may be used.
[*]Make the comic progress in reverse chronological order, sorta like in "Memento."* This does not mean 'write a normal comic backwards.' Rather, the action should progress in reverse chronological order from one panel to the next.

NOTE: Bonus points will be awarded for combining 2 of the rules into one comic. Big bonus points will be awarded if you can use all 3 in one comic. Keep in mind, however, that the point here is to be funny. A really funny comic that only follows one rule may beat a so-so comic that follows all 3.[/list=a]
[*]Any background may be used.

[*]Multiple entries are permitted.
[*]Photoshopped entries are not allowed.

[*]A winner will be selected 72 hours from now.

* I have not seen "Memento" yet. DO NOT tell me how it ends (begins?) or else I will send a singing, stripping Gabe-o-gram to your home.
[/list=1]

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

quote:

---

CC 58: Pick your poison...
...
NOTE: Bonus points will be awarded for combining 2 of the rules into one comic. Big bonus points will be awarded if you can use all 3 in one comic. Keep in mind, however, that the point here is to be funny.

---

Darn that funny rule; so much for my comic called "Mimento" about invisible mimes.

Oh well, I can always draw up "The Adventures of Nam Sdrawkcabcihtapelettnerapsnart".

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Bong.

CC 58 - Science Gone Wrong by gabe_billings 8-29-01

The combined might of the branches of the US military finally brought the creature down with a combination of rapier wit and horrific puns. But at a dear cost to the once mighty city. The unsuspecting inhabitants of downtown Gotham were taken completely by surpise as the hideous beast laid waste to the city with the awesome power of its Sonic Capitalization Blast. You tell 'em Judge Judy. He's a fuckin' li.... HOLY SHIT! The trouble began when the eminent geneticist Dr. Boorite isolated the so called 'Godzilla Gene' in test subject Crabby Johnson and subjected it to doses of gamma rays. HAY, THIS ISINT SO BAD!!!

---
100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

quote:

---

* I have not seen "Memento" yet. DO NOT tell me how it ends (begins?) or else I will send a singing, stripping Gabe-o-gram to your home.

---

With chaps.

---
100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

Damn it! I was going to use that rule next time I won a contest.

...and that's why I didn't use it last time. You're more trusting than I.

---
The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

Damn it! I was going to use that rule next time I won a contest.

...and that's why I didn't use it last time. You're more trusting than I.

---

Relax guys. You'll notice that my Memento in Three Frames comic didn't spoil the secret ending that he's really a sled.

Oh.

Shit.

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

CC 58: A Grayve Mistake by kaufman 8-29-01

Oh no, am I dead? How did I get here? Let me see. Last thing I remember I was on a plane. Why all that fuss about me opening the window? I just wanted a little air. And where was I flying from so panicked? Hold on a minute... if it's called the White House, shouldn't I be painting it WHITE?

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Only ingests two of the poisons ...

Ku Klutz Klan by kaufman 8-29-01

Okay, the costume's a bit strange, but I'm so excited. My first meeting. I really am becomin' a man! Hey Billy-Bob, you've got your hood on backwards!

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Notice how I goofed up the contest number in the title for uh, added comic effect! Not buying it, are you...

CC 57: "Tekken the Piss" by itsclark 8-29-01

What could have led to this colossal human tragedy? My god... the carnage... unspeakable! Had the "console wars" at last gone too far? Sony -- into thy hands I commend my... uuggnn!

---
"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

Here's mine... as contrived as the low-budget second sequel to a hit comedy, but here it is anyway...

CC-LVIII: Contrived? Surely you jest! by DexX 8-29-01

Hello, and welcome to Invisible Deaf-mute Telepaths Anonymous. This is my story... I always thought a life of invisibility would be great fun... until I discovered that I was gradually losing my hearing, and ability to speak... Shit! The rage I felt, and the subsequent killing spree I went on, can be traced back to an incident in my childhood, while swimming in the ocean... Hmmm... I reckon if I ever turned into an invisible deaf-mute, I might just have to massacre a whole lotta innocent people...

---
This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Polo blues by crabby 8-29-01

Little known fact trees are bi-polar. I long for my boy hood days as a young sprout. Little known fact there are no sprouts in this panel. Well know fact this is easily one of the worst comics ever. Great, now the GABE-BOT is jerking me off. He better not spunk on my polo.

---
I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

I dont know why but that really made me laugh.

Sorry bunner by crabby 8-29-01

Roger Moore?

Womensa, unlike Clemenza, left the cannoli. by ObiJo 8-30-01

Things turned ugly when the third member joined the Terre Haute branch of Mensa. Eyes off, string bean. She's mine, damn you. And don't call me string bean.

I like bunner's too much to think this has much of a chance. I actually had a similar idea, but it involved Robert Downey Junior.

---
I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

CC #58: Oh, the Pane! by itsclark 8-30-01

It was the year 2014. The industrialized nations of the earth lay in ruins. In the blink of an eye, it had all gone kablooey. No more art or music; no commerce or public services... The main server had crashed again. If only we hadn't installed Windows XXIV: Civilization has performed an illegal operation and will now shut down.

---
"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

Shit... You must have written some good rules, wirthling, because this contest has had some excellent strips submitted... glad I'm not judging...

---
This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Dolphin Physics by kaufman 8-30-01

So I said, "Well, those outboard motor turbines aren't going to generate gravitons by themselves!" Nice one, Flip. So what happened then? The guy just threw me -- *BURP* -- about a dozen fish.

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Speaking of dolphins, here is a background I made tonight and sent to JohnnyBrad to be put up when his wrist feels better. I have some kind of flu thing, and although I felt like drawing something, I didn't feel up to the challenge of trying to draw an accurate caricature. Hence I made this:

Do you think there will be a demand for, say, a dolphin, a shakr, and maybe a couple of big fish as characters? I won't do them until I have done all the outstanding forum users, but I just want to see if there is any interest out there...

---
This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

YES! This stuff is gold. I would love a diver or personal sub too.

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Nice! It properly fills a void we've got here.

My personal opinion is that among those, a shark would be great, and a generic big fish and a generic small fish would suffice (have separate images so that the small fish can be both at middle height, and near the bottom of the frame).

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

A diver in a big old-fashioned spherical diving helmet? Consider it done.... in a couple of weeks, maybe... It wouldn't be much use before JohnnyBrad's wrist gets better and he feels like doing all the typing involved to set up new characters and backgrounds, anyway. I have noticed that the Spankling character still hasn't turned up. Oh well...

---
This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

I just realized that DexX's undersea background conforms to all of the rules of this contest (degenerately to C, but who's counting?) And if wirthling were to award the prize to it, that would surely conform to the "must be funny" rule.

Your background has my vote!

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

...and I didn't break rule 4! I use Corel PhotoPaint, not Adobe PhotoShop! Kewl! I'm in!

Ouch, too many exclamation marks...

---
This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

I agree. There have already been a couple of "instant classics" posted and several other excellent strips. Judging this one will be difficult. Keep up the good work, all.

---
"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."