Tell me what you think and try not to pull punches the way you usually do, especially you biped and possums

in no order:

pre-paid ninja by mandingo 6-16-05

How much for a General E. Lee? A what? You take my balls in your mouth and hum dixieland 01 times. For you baby, I'll make that just fifty dollars. Hoi!! Or twenty. Twenty works.

Don't fuck with Magnetic Crotch Man by mandingo 6-22-05

I'm afraid you must pay for your public drunkeness, and I've got just the superpower to make you. I seem to be stuck to your crotch.

for the hutt's amusement by mandingo 6-22-05

thump thump thump thump deathmatch between a paraplegic and a quadraplegic thump thump

it started off like any other night by mandingo 6-23-05

quiet please, Cox family. thank you. first, yes I am an intruder and yes this is a real gun. what I promise is to behave in as profesional a manner as your actions allow me. my buisness card, Mr. Cox. wh.. what's it say, dad? "Phillip Johnson - putting the invasion in home invasion for the better part of this sentence." ... ... ... ... i don't get it. what's it... HEY! that's your dick in my family!

Walking into his daughter's room... by mandingo 6-24-05

oh yah, that's the shit right there. oh baby, your pussy so tight WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING TO MY DAUGHTER, YOU SICK FUCK!!!!! SHE'S ONLY 3 YEARS OLD!!!!! 3 years old??? sir, I'm so sorry! she told me she was 18!! and you believed ... ... gotcha you did. i'm not gonna lie

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what if nigger meant kite

to grandmother's house we go by mandingo 6-24-05

what are you doing to my grandson? i'm ravishing him mercilesly. for all his life, my face will be the first of his days and the last of his nights. it is MY face he'll awake to from nightmares. mine he'll recall on his deathbed. i doubt he'll recall your face tomorrow with you going at him from behind like that ... ... dammit, you're right. i'll have to start over. thanks a lot, grandma! I'll go make those peanut butter cookies for when you kids finish up

Find the literally, win a commemorative twig by mandingo 6-26-05

i'm gonna go out on a limb here and guess you're not really a "ghost with legs," there never was a "Cole Mansion Mystery" and our discovery of the "sacred rope" is about to seem much less satisfying

#only autobiographical comic by mandingo 7-06-05

to tell the truth, manny, i never have high hopes for blind dates, but this is going really well. so what's it like playing poker for a living? it's cool. it's like you live in a world where the smart kids get to bully around the dumb ones, the mean ones, the jocks that sounds great the shy ones, the lonely ones, those who were up all night with their sick kid okay, i get it the senile ones, suicidal ones, the ones who just lost both their parents in a car accident...

THE ONE by mandingo 7-07-05

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK who is it? WHO IS IT? IT IS THE ONE WHO MAKES YOUR LIFE A LIVING HELL . THE ONE YOU WILL CURSE YOUR GOD FOR TONIGHT. THE ONE THAT MAKES YOU WONDER WHAT YOU DID TO DESERVE THIS. kids, grandma's here

nigger in your crawl space by mandingo 7-08-05

KNOCK KNOCK who's there? nigger in your crawl space nigger in my crawl space who? keys to the porsche keys to the porsche who?

and these three comics are only worth reading if you like puns (even then just barely)

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what if nigger meant kite

oh and those are the top 10 that have never been posted. if it was total there'd be a lot of what if nigger/herpes/faggot comics dominating the list plus this one which is my top rated

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what if nigger meant kite

Why aren't you at zero stars yet? Don't people know that if they really loved you they'd give you a bad rating, but rate all your comics as good?

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

preach it brother!

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what if nigger meant kite

I liked "THE ONE". That's it.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

I also liked "THE ONE".

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All-ah ha-reh int-eh lika bra som duuuu!

The One was very good.

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"These Pretzels Are Making Me Thirsty"

thanks for reading them and liking 'THE ONE'. heres four more in case someone was hoping to like them in multiples of 7

a bar at night by mandingo 7-11-05

joe, man, lia's leaving me. i love her so much but she can't get over the fact I don't want kids or maybe YOU can't get over the fact SHE doesn't want kids do you realize whenever i tell you something very important you make a joke out of it by reversing what i'm saying? you've done it since your dad committed suicide while you were on the phone with him or maybe YOU'VE done it since YOUR dad committed suicide while YOU were on the phone with HIM trying reverse psychology

YOU MONSTER by mandingo 7-11-05

WHAT ARE YOU DOING? i'm sawing our first born in half I KNOW! EVER HEARD OF NEWSPAPER?

i wonder by mandingo 7-11-05

i wonder who's tougher HEY ASSHOLE! YOU THINK I CAN TAKE YOU? who me? yah probably. you seem pretty pissed i wonder who's a better speller

a mysterious stranger by mandingo 7-11-05

wow, you scared those rustlers right off! so what's your name, stranger? my name isn't important but it's William. William L. Jameson L's for Lawrence The Third

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what if nigger meant kite

well thats demoralizing. the best i have to offer and i only hit the target 1 out of 14 times. add velcro and i just described the archery event at the special olympics

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what if nigger meant kite

1 out of 14 it pretty damn good for someone who's retarded and legally blind.

And You Monster! was hilarious.

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

wasnt diminishing your bronze, just making a joke

thanks. i did my best without a sawed in half baby character

that makes 2 for 14. stop pushing ladies

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what if nigger meant kite

"walking into his daughters room..." and "a bar at night" are great. "i wonder" is pretty good, too.
I don't get why "THE ONE" is the most popular one here. I thought it was lame.
I guess that's why it's good that you've got some variety in there, though. Dead babies and pedophilia for people like me, wholesome family fun and racism for the masses. Everyone's a winner.
You serious about wanting to lose all your stars? I've got you rated good now, but I'll change it if it would really make you happy.

you gots teh funny

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I dumb :D

I was highly amused by the whole 2nd batch.

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What others say about boorite!

ah i am complete now. ravage my body while my soul goes up to heaven, pulled down occasionaly when you hit that spot you know i love so much

i make it a point to write with the entire prison in mind, not just my cellblock

its not about me. its about you, and Burt, and your eyes, and bleeding

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what if nigger meant kite

and your ass a reaming.

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obscenity filter is off

I've seen most of those before, but those last four were a pleasant surprise.  Awesome!  Especially i wonder.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

a small glimpse of why mandingo is favoritest favorite.

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Kill Whitey.

Given that I consider you and Choadwarrior the consistently funniest comic makers, I was surprised that the first batch didn't do it for me. The second one did, though.

Without pulling any punches:

I thought "pre-paid ninja" was alright when I read it, but then I saw the title and couldn't stop laughing. As a callcentre worker for a telco, this really appeals.

I didn't think much of "Don't fuck with Magnetic Crotch Man", although kudos on using the art that's available to give the impression of motion.

I didn't like "for the hutt's amusement", but the idea of such a fight would work well in another medium.

"it started off like any other night" started off badly, like any other comic that expands the panels, but really came through with the punchline. I like it.

"walking into his daughters room..." made no sense to me. Was the kid playing a prank on her father? I think this would have worked better if it had finished "and you believed her? What the hell?" "Ha ha, no. I'm just messing with you, she didn't really say that" "Oh. Ha ha, you got me! Yeah... you got me. Ha ha."

"to grandmother's house we go" wasn't bad. I'd prefer it without the last panel though, and it should end with only the word "dammit", but that's probably just me.

"find the literally, win a commemorative twig" I'm going to assume I'm missing a reference here, because that went straight over my head.

"#only autobiographical comic" Is a masterpiece. You magnificent bastard, that's some funny shit.

"The one" is clever, but not really funny.

I found "nigger in your crawl space" a little amusing, but not great.

I didn't much like "a bar at night". I can't really say why though.

"You monster" is brilliant. Say the word (pm) and I'll draw you a guy holding a saw and half a baby.

"I wonder" got a bit of a giggle. I don't know if that was because I was still amused because of "you monster" or if it seemed worse than it really was because it wasn't as good as "you monster".

I cracked a smile on "a mysterious stranger".

Overall: I don't mind your work as a whole, and every now and then you pull out something brilliant. The lack of punctuation is a little off-putting though.

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Dinosaurs had eggs bro, the chicken came way later.

oops, sorry i missed these recent comments back in April. i don't check RMDC much since being able to add my favorite p33ps to RSS feeds. thanks for everyone's comments

Injokesterthe word (pm)! The Word (PM)! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, THE WORD (PM)!

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what if nigger meant kite

everyone has their own opinion on what is and what is not funny. it's difficult to please everyone

w0rd. just please yourself. and your p.o.

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what if nigger meant kite

I'm giving my opinion!! This is fun!! Please don't cry...

I did not understand/get/"feel":

pre-paid ninja

don't fuck with magnetic crotch man

it started off like any other night

walking into his daughters room...

find the literally, win a commerative twig.

nigger in your crawlspace

However, I at least cracked a smile with all the rest!

And to make more lists because I like making lists, here are the ones that brought me over the smile into a laugh:

only autobiographical comic

the one

you monster

i wonder

a mysterious stranger

And...Yes. That is the end of my opinion. I hope this helps. Even if it doesn't help you, but helps some starving child in Africa somehow, I hope it helps.

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Ask me about Loom!