Here are some of my comics...I've only made five so far, but pretty much all of them are worded badly or just don't seem right. A tip or two woud be greatly appreciated.
All in all, not bad. You're right about the wording. Picture the characters being real people and make them talk like those people would. Try modeling them after people you know-it makes it easier.
I liked your use of Chen changing in a room, but still talking through the door. It added a bit of suspense as to what he'd be wearing when he reemerged.
Quite a good series. considering you've only made five of them. I especially liked how youy made him talk behind a door only to reamerge with the wrong suit on. I like your choice of character which was the Grim Reaper. Still the faact that you seem pretty new to this is remarkable. Keep up the good work!
I didn't think it was too wordy. Unlike a standard "punch line" comic, each of these strips was telling a story. The story is apparent in each single strip AND they all form a larger story when read together. It flows fairly smooth without being bogged down with too much techno-jargan or unnessessary filler. The humor is relatable if not mildly exagerated (unless bear atacks are common where you live). for example-Everybody has ruined something they borrowed from someone else and felt bad about it.
I wish Stripcreator had a bear for bear attack scenes! But, off panel stories sometimes help with the humor and force creativity.