The self taught lesbian.

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"Humiliation is humiliation only when you choose to suffer." ~ Chuck Palahniuk, Choke

There has to be an easier way to fart over the PA system.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

Corn? When did I eat corn?

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

Giving birth to yourself is easy.  Impregnating yourself, BY yourself, is the hard part.

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

"Ellen was right. My cooch DOES smell like seagull puke."

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Kill Whitey.

Mrs. Murphy, when I said 'check your stool for blood', I meant AFTER you use the toilet.

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"He was cursed with a horrorshow of a face, like Guiseppe Archbold doing a study of mollusk tumors."

See?  SEE????   I DO know my ass from a hole in the ground!

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I has a flavor!

"I hate to be smug, but if you want it done right..."

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bigworm

Seconds before she fucks herself in the ass with her headset mic...

Klein body.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

With the advent of the internet, auditions for porn movies became much more rigorous.

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

♫ Fart sniffer! Check it and see! â™«

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...and if you liked that one, here's a link to my other stupid shit.

For my next trick, I'll clean that brown stain with my four foot tongue.

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Bringing you comics, once a year. Whether you want them or not.

It's just like any other relationship... if you want to be close, you have to work at it.

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bigworm