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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

Fixed it.

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Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

"Product placement" is just getting way out of hand.

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

Jack finally found a use for his frigid woman - keeping his drink cold.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Adrian Zmed couldn't satisfy her so maybe a nice cold beverage could.

so THAT'S a ring-pull?

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Dad was flammable

So that's where Mountain Dew gets its distinctive taste.

No, that's how they get those cans to fire across the grand canyon in the commercials.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

"Damn. How can I compete against that?"

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My girlfriend doesn't like me. She likes your girlfriend.

- That's nothing - I know a girl who likes the big 2 litre bottles.

- She needs a six-pack if she wants multiple orgasms...

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

"It's the only way we figured out how to keep her mouth shut."

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My girlfriend doesn't like me. She likes your girlfriend.

I'd like to see her try a 3 liter bottle

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My life totally and completely REEKS.

"THERE IT IS"

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:\

- Pepsico stock rose 30% today on reports of the surge in popularity of their new vending machines.

- [smacks head] "I could have had a V8!"

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

--Doris believed a cola douche to be an effective contraceptive, until she gave birth to this.

--Some moviegoers will do anything to avoid paying concession stand prices.

--Apparently, yer maw was all out of ginger boatles.

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What others say about boorite!

Where can I put my coin?

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What?

And for my next trick, I'll make 7-up mine.

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My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in. -Weird Al Yankovic

Honey, have you seen my Mountain Dew?

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:\

Do The Dew.

(duh.)

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"America loves its kings, from George III to Larry." --HJS

quote:

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Do The Dew.

(duh.)

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