And a full tip of the hat to crabby for the idea marching into RMDC like he was a brand new stripper and posting comics from when he was a brand new stripper. After all, back when we were brand new strippers, there wasn't even an RMDC! Like when I was brand new, two years ago today. Which of course is the justification for this post.

On that Tuesday two trips around the sun ago, I was led to this site by a twist of circumstance (and a random number generator) that has been explained before, and won't be repeated here in order to protect the innocent and keep you from going to Nebraska and lynching her. And at some point, I banged the "make a comic" button, twiddled around with some backgrounds and characters, eventually found an idea I could play with, and soon came up with this:

[Click to view comic: 'Only You Can Prevent Forrest Fires']

Yeah, I know. Spontaneous combustion gag, ha ha ha! See why I don't chide newcomers too hard for doing what comes naturally when they're just getting their legs here? (Admittedly, that one had three advantages on your typical someone-catches-fire comic: an explanation for it happening tied in with a little joke (Spock: "A very little joke."), the first of my trademark gratuitous punny titles, and of course, NO, ZERO, ZIP, NADA! GRATUITOUS NARRATION BOXES!!!!).

Anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah, in the other 30 or so comics I whipped off that day, I got more experimental and original. From the free-form

[Click to view comic: 'Random Haikomik #1']

to the whimsical

[Click to view comic: 'Nightmare on Barnum St.']

to several featuring our old friend Cthulhu.

[Click to view comic: 'Public Service Announcement']

But even then, all my jokes were sophisticated.

[Click to view comic: 'One Partly Sunny Day in Stepford']

Ok, maybe not. But I got better. Honestly. Read my stuff if you care to.

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

I love you, Kaufman.

---
“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

That stuff is still way above most of the stupid crap you read here. It's interesting, because one can see your inexperience, but at the same time you're coming up with original stuff, as opposed to horrendously bad stuff. Inexperience does not excuse horrendous comics. For example:

[Click to view comic: 'Happy Little Robot']

My first comic. Note the artistic use of the over-inflated dialogue bubble that creates a hole in space-time below their feet.

---
Sex Piano.

Should we start a spontaneous combustion thread?

[Click to view comic: 'What's the Antimatter with You?']

---
Life is a lot like getting mugged; you get your kicks, you take your punches, and when it's over, someone else gets your cash.

Today's my third anniversary! So here are five more pieces of history from my Day One:

[Click to view comic: 'So Long and Thanks for all the Great Danes!']
[Click to view comic: 'Gates of Hell']
[Click to view comic: 'Blooper Reel']
[Click to view comic: 'Fire Elemental High School']
[Click to view comic: 'Wait till she wants to sell her soul']

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

And because you're such a good audience, five more pieces of first-day time-wasting!

[Click to view comic: 'The Love Craft']
[Click to view comic: 'Highlights Outtakes']
[Click to view comic: 'International Brotherhood of Gollums ON STRIKE!']
[Click to view comic: 'Busted!']
[Click to view comic: 'Cruceffects']

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Those were great. It's as though you sprang fully-grown out of somebody's head.

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

And now some second-day covers from 3 years ago:

[Click to view comic: 'From the Unabridged Bible']
[Click to view comic: 'Another Science Lesson']
[Click to view comic: 'Why Microsoft Scrabble Isn't Popular (corrected)']
[Click to view comic: 'If TITANIC were written by a Jewish mother']
[Click to view comic: 'Forever Clueless']

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Rate "good", next, rate "good", next....

---
The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

I don't know...on the second day it looks as though you were just coasting on the former glory of your first day. On the third day you were probably just a washed-up has-been on the street doing some degrading herky-jerky dance in a tutu for nickels.

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Judge for yourself, though by Day 3 I was gasping for air. Only six comics, including:

[Click to view comic: 'Evolution of a lie']
[Click to view comic: 'Resurrecch']
[Click to view comic: 'Speedball']
[Click to view comic: 'A Haiku and a Limerick walk into a bar']
[Click to view comic: 'Beating around the Bush']

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Drat, I was planning a "Dog On Ball crosses America" comic. Stop doing stuff three years before I think of it!

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Aaaah, kaufman. Like that first taste of vanilla ice cream.

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

I thought "5/29 is just around the corner... I could do my own 'first day' post." And then I read my stuff.

Nice kick off, Dr. K!

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet