Will you?

Pretty pretty please?

And how do I get stars?

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u dummy i bet u cant evn get on fire in nba jam

you get stars by being DAMN sexy!
and by licking brad's envelopes...

*actually, i have NO IDEA how you get those stars...i think the donors vote for you or some shit like that.*

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- Julie

You get stars by being obnoxious, intentionally annoying people with stars, and by spamming threads.

Actually, that's not true, I'm just lying because I'm an ass. :)

Read the FAQ.

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Sex Piano.

Okay

I know about stars now

But what do you people think of my comics?

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u dummy i bet u cant evn get on fire in nba jam

They're really funny, actually. Some are stupid, but that's good too. Nice work.

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Sex Piano.

I think you definitely have potential...just keep going. and don't allow yourself to be restrained by what society has taught you is funny. i don't know if that makes much sense...it seems as if theyre not complete...like, there needs to be just one more panel. or maybe, better use of a panel...go beyond the obvious.
but then again, i am very much so a newbie, so listen to someone else like trippingbilliee or mmyers...

again, keep going, and read others'...it helps me.
have fun with it. that is, after all, the point.

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- Julie

This one made me chuckle.

New York by qwertypod 7-01-03

Mommy! Help! I'm being kidnapped! Daughter! Help! I'm being mugged! New York: A Place Where Your Family Can Really Interact

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

Yay

Someone chuckled

Yay

I have stars

They're just the kind that are really far away and you can't see em

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u dummy i bet u cant evn get on fire in nba jam

Excellent.

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

Is that your thought of my comics or your thought of pie?

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u dummy i bet u cant evn get on fire in nba jam

hey guys, whats up? i hate jews. that is all.

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cunt of the day: all you dumb niggers

I hate you Zero. Anyways, Qwerty your NY comic was the best. You've really got stop going for the obvious joke.

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Guh? Guh.

Obvious joke?

If you are reffering to "Godzilla", that one just sucks

And are you really a cartoonist in real life?

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u dummy i bet u cant evn get on fire in nba jam

Yes I really am an honest to God published cartoonist. I really have strips in papers. The Godzilla one sucked, but obvious man ran its ground before the strip was even out. Think a bit more subversive, and don't be afraid of going out on a limb.

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Guh? Guh.

Don't these two things kinda contradict each other?

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u dummy i bet u cant evn get on fire in nba jam

Yeah his comics pretty much suck hard.

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Guh? Guh.

yea, suck like a fucking penis in my mouth. AND YES IM A GUY.

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cunt of the day: all you dumb niggers

Well said, except the stupid ones actually AREN'T good, they're stupid.

I really like your short, quick style. But be careful of jokes that are overused or too obvious. This is an example of a funny comic. It's consise, complete, and the punchline is accentuated with a pun, no less. Glory!

War on Peace by qwertypod 7-05-03

The Real Cause of Violence in America Mommy! I'm bored! You know, honey. When I was young we threw rocks at the local hippie for entertainment ... Hehehe >: ) Whatcha got there little girl?

I also liked this one a lot. Leave emoticons and webspeak out of comics, though; it makes them more presentable.

John is a Homo by qwertypod 7-01-03

John, I think we should see other people Why!? Because you're gay, John Well what does that have to do with anything!?

This comic is also funny, but you got rid of your fast-paced punchline in favor of too much text. The last panel would be funnier shorter, like if he were just saying, "So?"

Strict School by qwertypod 7-03-03

The School System is Stricter than Ever Remember kids, your homework is due today. Johnny, can I see your license and presentation please?

This comic is an example of a joke that just isn't funny enough to stand on its own. It's simply a retort to an old (and no longer used) expression. But the retort itself is old, and not that funny; the comic needs more.

Kids Say the Most Manic Things #4 by qwertypod 7-05-03

I'm hungry! Oh stop whining! Right now, in China, there are hundreds of little children starving to death Are you saying you care more about strangers in China than your own daughter!?

This is another example of one that's just not funny enough. This is the kind of thing that anyone could think of. It might be amusing if your friend said it during a preview, but in a comic, where sarcastic remarks about Arnold are expected, it's too predictable.

The Tube and John #1 by qwertypod 7-03-03

Arnold Schwarzenegger is back and better than ever in T3! Better than ever? Like THATS a hard thing to accomplish...

Overall I thought most of your comics were quite good. Keep trying.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

That's a nice little critic you got there

But something has struck me as strange...

The comics I hold in high esteem people tend to like less and the ones I think lower of people tend to like more

Such as this one, which is one of my favorites. No i've asked has liked it

French Molestation by qwertypod 7-01-03

Good evening. We are here today to honor those valiant men and women that are going into war Now some of you will die, the rest of you will most likely be molested After all, this is the French we're dealing with

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u dummy i bet u cant evn get on fire in nba jam

Don't feel bad. That's only because it sucks.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

Oh...

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u dummy i bet u cant evn get on fire in nba jam

I'm going to revive this topic because I'm a selfish whore

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u dummy i bet u cant evn get on fire in nba jam

The whore strikes yet again

What do you think of this one?

Circle Game by qwertypod 7-15-03

You know, I had a really great time tonight Really? Yah, your not like most guys. You didn't just stare at my ass the whole time Yeah well, after years of playing "The Circle Game" as a child I've trained myself never to look lower than the waist

And this one?

The Tube and John #8 by qwertypod 7-15-03

Oh my god! I'm, like, sooo fat. I mean, size three!? I need to throw up Why is everyone so worried about personal apearance? They should do what I do: Wear a corset under your T-Shirt

And maybe this one?

Soap Opera by qwertypod 7-09-03

You don't even know me mom! My life is so complicated. It's like a soap opera, with all the co... Have you ever looked at a cookie and broke down crying? Well no, not exac... Then you're life is NOT like a soap opera!

Eh? eh?

Come on

Don't be shy

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u dummy i bet u cant evn get on fire in nba jam

Let me emphasize on that yet again

DON'T BE SHY

Unless you are shy...

Then go ahead

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u dummy i bet u cant evn get on fire in nba jam

Soap Opera was good.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.