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TheCheese
Stripcreator Newbie

Yeah, my comic.

Comic = here.

7-24-03 9:25am (new)
quote : comics : pm : info


Zerosignalone
Member - Tobor Fan Club

Member Rated:

they suck go eat a tree hippie

---
cunt of the day: all you dumb niggers

7-24-03 9:45am (new)
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TheCheese
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

Wow, aren't you nice. I hate to say this, but I hate people like you, who flame, and never give feedback otherwise. Have a nice day, and I hope you choke on one of those cocks you're sucking.

7-24-03 9:59am (new)
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TheCheese
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

The least you could do is use proper grammar, oh ye of little brain.

7-24-03 10:00am (new)
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Zerosignalone
Member - Tobor Fan Club

Member Rated:

at least u could shutup and stop harrassing me :-\

---
cunt of the day: all you dumb niggers

7-24-03 10:04am (new)
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mmyers
Passing through.

Member Rated:

Each comic gets a little better. Keep it up. Onward and upward.

---
Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

7-24-03 10:06am (new)
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Zerosignalone
Member - Tobor Fan Club

Member Rated:

shut the hell up

---
cunt of the day: all you dumb niggers

7-24-03 10:09am (new)
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TheCheese
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

I bet you were a lonely little child, weren't you? Did you have daddy issues?

7-24-03 10:13am (new)
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mmyers
Passing through.

Member Rated:

Gross. Don't talk to me. You're getting your suck all over my school clothes.

---
Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

7-24-03 12:17pm (new)
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Zerosignalone
Member - Tobor Fan Club

Member Rated:

jee you guys really know how to make a gal feel special :-)

---
cunt of the day: all you dumb niggers

7-24-03 1:11pm (new)
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boinky33
I'm with stupid ^

Member Rated:

And you don't. That's why you're alone.

7-24-03 2:11pm (new)
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MrAdventure
Pink Donkey Wrangler

Member Rated:

yeah, what ar you zerosign-alone-?

why dont yuo go have sex right now. don't froget to write dwon *exactly* waht goes son so we believe you had sex otherwies the internet will never forgive you

ohj man, good one dood, he msut be a lonely virgin! :rollin ;x :x

---
I STILL DON'T NEED THIS PLACE TO DO CMOICS BRAD, YOU FUCKING GOLLIWOG PICANINNY FUCKER :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

7-24-03 5:51pm (new)
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Zerosignalone
Member - Tobor Fan Club

Member Rated:

quote:
yeah, what ar you zerosign-alone-?

why dont yuo go have sex right now. don't froget to write dwon *exactly* waht goes son so we believe you had sex otherwies the internet will never forgive you

ohj man, good one dood, he msut be a lonely virgin! :rollin ;x :x


actually, its ZERO-SIGNAL-ONE, but alone works too!!

and second, I HAVE SEX WTIH MY DAD EVERY NIGHT AND I LOVE IT :-\

---
cunt of the day: all you dumb niggers

7-24-03 8:22pm (new)
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Rabid_Weasle
Professional style cramper

Member Rated:

I hope you're on the pill.

---
Poop.

7-24-03 9:38pm (new)
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Boritom
Destroyer of Worlds, Crocheter of beer-can hats

Member Rated:

quote:
Yeah, my comic.

Comic = here.


I shall actually comment on the content of the comics, and not make a snotty-ass wisecrack that will just annoy everyone:

I think Your comics are fairly amusing, TheCheese! Not the best, but definitely worth a look.

Okay, lets get back to mindlessly bashing eachother, now! WoooHooo!

---
[i]"For the love of beatings, I plunder until my loins find satisfaction!!" [/i]

7-24-03 10:17pm (new)
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boinky33
I'm with stupid ^

Member Rated:

I love this guy.

7-25-03 6:32pm (new)
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TheCheese
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

Which guy do you love, boinky?

7-27-03 9:21am (new)
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Kaddar
Captain Insano

Member Rated:

quote:
quote:
Yeah, my comic.

Comic = here.


I shall actually comment on the content of the comics, and not make a snotty-ass wisecrack that will just annoy everyone:

I think Your comics are fairly amusing, TheCheese! Not the best, but definitely worth a look.

Okay, lets get back to mindlessly bashing eachother, now! WoooHooo!


In continuing the mindful comments, I disagree, I think these comics have a series of events, but no punch line. These comics would do better with a punch line, even if that punchline was dirty and horrible.

For example:
you had:
[Click to view comic: 'Checking E-mail']

I did:
[Click to view comic: 'Kaddar Remix #1: Checking E-mail by TheCheese']

You had:
[Click to view comic: 'Checking E-mail Part II']

I did:
[Click to view comic: ' Kaddar Remix #2: Checking E-mail 2 by TheCheese']

The other two newer ones I have no idea what's going on anyways.

7-30-03 5:11pm (new)
quote : comics : pm : info


TheCheese
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

I beg your pardon, but my comics do have punch lines, they are just subtle. Just wanted to clear that up.

7-30-03 5:44pm (new)
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Choobychooby
Loveable Scamp

Member Rated:

I like your comics, TheCheese, they get better as you continue to make them, I look forward to reading more.

---
"In a thousand years there will be no men and women just wankers and that's fine by me."

7-30-03 6:53pm (new)
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Kaddar
Captain Insano

Member Rated:

Also, this is just my opinion, the other stripcreators may disagree, but like, in this comic:

[Click to view comic: 'MTV Music Generator']

I think the "..." in the second panel actually distracts from the comic, I think the ol'garfield treatment of having panels where neither character says anything can be great for a delayed joke.

By the way

I'm not saying all comics need an obvious knock knock joke punchline, for example, here is a comic of mine with the last statement being "good point":
[Click to view comic: 'hoo-mans']
But I'm just trying to help you improve.

But what do I know, someone posted in my comments for my account: "Possibly only has one eye." so maybe I'm not just seeing things straight. Or maybe I'm just as awsome as a pirate. I'm not exactly sure what it means.

7-30-03 8:18pm (new)
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TheCheese
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

I would have taken those "..." statements out, but unfortunately, StripCreator doesn't let you change current comics, or even delete comics... so I can't... stupid people should make that an option... *shakes fist*

7-31-03 9:06am (new)
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TheCheese
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

Pirates = cool, so I'd take that as a compliment if I were you Kaddar. :)

7-31-03 9:07am (new)
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mmyers
Passing through.

Member Rated:

Hey Cheese,
Not to plug for the site or anything, but...
Donators can delete comics. That's why I did it, because some of my comics felt like naked baby pictures, they sucked so bad.

I think Kaddar brings up some good points. A good no text panel has a lot of comic value. You can almost hear the eyelids flicker. Subtly is good and funny at times, but...punchlines and bookends like "yeah" or "?" or "OK" are hit and miss and require a good set up to make them work. When most comics end that way, usually the punch line is the middle panel and the last panel is just something the stripper had left over and just want to fill it with something. Also, comics, as with people, seem to be funnier when the characters are firmly commited to something. Complacent people make for complacent comics. Kaddar's examples of variations on a theme were good versions of this. He raised the stakes of the characters and punched up the jokey part. That's not to say you have to spell everything out, just raise the stakes.

These are by no means die hard rules, but they're things I've noticed about the comics that make me laugh.

Enough serious talk. Tallywacker. Ah, that's better.

---
Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

7-31-03 9:43am (new)
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kramer_vs_kramer
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

I'm not sure Kaddar's versions were any funnier than the originals.

7-31-03 9:53am (new)
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