Brenjamin! I'm so surprised to see you back at work so soon! What happened with the bug shits?
I got cleared by my doctor and I'm back at work ready to perform my duties.
Are your duties filled with bugs? Seriously, you don't tell a man your shit was full of bugs to leave work and not finish that story when you find out what was wrong!
It was corn.
Wait a second... Didn't I fire you for whiping your ass standing up? Get the fuck out of my sight you miserable bastard.