quodlibet  

Dear Santa. I have been very good this year.

I hate the commercialization of Christmas and I'm sure so do you. After all, with one billion kids in the world, you've got to pay your elves overtime and a half.

So if you'll just send me a little vial or two of smallpox, I'll take the blame for you in return for Galactic Overlordship next year. Yours Sincerely.