I used to go out with a girl who would sneak off and puke up the dinner I just paid for.

What a liar.

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

You went out with a girl and she vomitted repeatedly?

There are no words to describe my lack of surprise.

---
Dad was flammable

quote:

---

You went out with a girl and she vomitted repeatedly?

There are no words to describe my lack of surprise.

---

Mikey, Mikey, Mikey:

If you don't like that response, don't take your dates to Ipecac-In-The-Box.

HTH!

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

This comment is useless without pics.

---
I has a flavor!

This comment is useless without pics.

It was also about 40 degrees out.

Shut up. If you're one of those people who can eat whatever the fuck you want without ever getting fat, then just shut the fuck up. SHUT THE FUCK UP.

Here's something you should try eating. SHIT. EAT SHIT. That should keep your fucking weight down.

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

This comment is useless without pics.

It was also about 40 degrees out.

Me being from Canada and all, I read that as 40 degrees Celsius, after which I thought "So you were soaking wet because you were sweating so bad?"

Then I remembered Fahrenheit.

---
Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.

In the classroom of the world, Canada is like the slow kid who needs "special attention."

---
peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

America is the fat one who picks on the all the foreign kids for their lunch money.

and their oil reserves.

---
Dad was flammable

This thread makes me hungry.

---
dcomposed:11-06-05: If I was a viking invading your village, you'd be the first to get raped.
Crabby: 10/5/06: i would love to feed you fresh fruit while bathing you.

Saskatoon, the city that Rabid and I live in, has been titled 'the fattest city in Canada'.

Rock on.

---
Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.

Hey, don't look at me. Not like I'm contributing to the title.

---
Poop.

boinky33 may have eaten the title.

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

[Click to view comic: 'Never Enough']

---
Think classy, you'll be classy.

Until I was about 20 or so, I was insanely skinny. I could lay around all day, eat all the fatty foods I wanted, whatever. I never gained weight. I think I maxed out at 147 in high school. When I was nearly 21, I started gaining weight like crazy. I ended up maxing at over 180. Had a beer gut and big thighs. It wasn't terrible, but I felt really ugly at that point. I wanted to gain weight, but not like that. I wanted it everywhere, kinda evened out.

I tried to figure out what changed. I thought it may have been the beer, but no, beer supposedly makes you gain weight because of empty carbs... like what's in soda. I drank plenty of soda.

I finally realized, I had changed my eating habits. Working, I had a more structured life. I would eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner. When I was in school, I ate twice as much, but I ate probably 7 or more times a day. I spaced out my eating throughout the day and at a lot of junk food, but I got a little exercise.

I dunno, maybe my metabolism just slowed down, but I recently dropped back down to about 152 or so. I don't know.

---
Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ants.

I was 150 from the start of high school until about 3 years ago. Now I'm 210. My metabolism died and went to hell.

---
I has a flavor!

I eat children.

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

I eat MikeyG's. because they're low on carbs but high on children.

---
There was once a man who said:"nothing is true!". Although later it was found out that he was lying.

Adult humans are too salty for my taste. Little kids are too sugary. Babies have a milder taste but can use some thyme.

And everyone knows that eating kittens is just plain wrong!

quote:

---

Babies have a milder taste but can use some thyme.

---

You think that's bad? After we got our herbs and vegetables delivered at work, I was threatened for my thymely puns.

Blame my mother. She started me in on the thyme jokes when I was 7.

That was hardly sage of her.

Where did I put my mace?

Let's not get caraway'd here.

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.