I almost handed this off to bunner, but I was afraid it'd just keep going round and round until it caught fire. So.

1. The subject is "Xtreme" sports. Suicide or natural selection? Fad or hype? Irritating or annoying? Explore.

2. "Xtreme" product tie-ins, the stupider the better.

3. If you are not familiar with the "Xtreme" ad crap (for example, you are a woman or an Australian), too bad. Just Google it and use whatever comes up.

4. The term "sports" may include sexual practices, but any such gags had better be funny.

The contest ends Thursday at 5-something PM EST. I'm trying to speed things up a little.

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What others say about boorite!

In my rush to be first and worst I created typos. So be it.
[Click to view comic: 'Xstreme Harvesting']

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Hah! Mine's more worsier than yours!

[Click to view comic: 'CC45: Xtremely Dumm']

actually... I need to clarify the product tie-in... one moment.

Okay, this is the real entry... and look, it's rules compliant this time! (But it's still more worsier than Spankling's!)

[Click to view comic: 'CC 45: Xtremely Dummer than ever, now with Dumm Merchandise']

[Click to view comic: 'CC45: Xtremely hard rules to be funny with']

That's not a hydraulic hammer. It's a curved-claw hammer with a hardwood handle, probably hickory, with a flat face for driving nails flush to the board. The 16 oz weight is common. No home or apartment should be without one.

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What others say about boorite!

Also, that's a framing nail, which is OK for rough or hidden work, but if you're going to drive nails into your forehead, use finishing nails. Tap them below scalp level using a nail set and hide them with filler compound or makeup foundation.

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What others say about boorite!

quote:

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Hah! Mine's more worsier than yours!

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No, I'd say you followed Rule 4, alright.

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What others say about boorite!

Fairmont does make a rotary hammer, but it's not for driving fasteners into one's forehead. Probably Crabby meant the Fairmont rotary impact hammer drill. That will make short work of masonry.

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What others say about boorite!

So I lied. This won't win anyway.

[Click to view comic: 'CC 45: An Xtremely Old Joke']

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Now there is a benchmark to reach for! Many try. Few ever come close.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

[Click to view comic: 'CC45: X-Treme Bird Love']

why does he bother?

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Who knows what fear lurks in the hearts of men? MIKE BOBSICO KNOWS! And if you give him a decent tip when he delivers your mail , he might tell you.

GASP! I have been de-throned!

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Why would you want to hide the nails? I bang mine about halfway in and then bend them over, so my head looks like some sorta crappy tree fort made by 8-year-olds. It looks supercool and it gives me a place to hang my sunglasses.

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

Why would you want to hide the nails? I bang mine about halfway in and then bend them over, so my head looks like some sorta crappy tree fort made by 8-year-olds. It looks supercool and it gives me a place to hang my sunglasses.

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Two problems I had with that. 1. The nails get cold in the winter giving me a headache. 2. My wife complains when they poke her in the belly.

She's been pushing to have my face tiled over with a mosaic in the likeness of Paul Newman.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Wait, are we still talking about nails?

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What others say about boorite!

I just want to say something about that Olympic snowboarder who lost the gold because he was stoned during the event: If you can win a gold medal after smoking pot, they should probably give you a second one.

[Click to view comic: 'CC 45: Xtremely dumb sports']

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

[Click to view comic: 'Xtreme Xomic']

[Click to view comic: 'cc45: Xtremely Bad Sports']

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At least im still funny .....looking. http://www.carrionfields.com

[Click to view comic: 'Beamon Up, Scotty']

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

[Click to view comic: 'We did say Xtreme ...']

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

[Click to view comic: 'Almost 42 billion microns']

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

You owe me royalties for stealing my idea. Or you can wait 23 years until it becomes public domain again.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.