Welcome to BTC #5. This is the third panel of one of my dumbest comics. I would like to see how other people would begin it. Please do not use "butt creme" in your comic because I already did. Please do not change anything about the third panel, except maybe the guy with his arms crossed and the background.

BTC #5: Template by biped 5-15-04

You BASTARD.

PLEASE NOTE: If it looks as though there are not very many entries to this contest being submitted after a certain period of time has elapsed, I will feel bad.

The judging is done by not 1, but 3 users. The contest winner chooses the other 2 judges at the start of the new contest. The other 2 judges are however free to create comics and enter them. A majority decision is preferred, but in the event of all 3 judges voting seperately, the original judge has the casting vote.

Your other 2 judges for this:

OMG_DaGmAr_6481987

NooniePuuBunny

This is Saturday afternoon. Judging will take place next Saturday afternoon, leaving you with a window of approximately one week in which to submit your entries.

I hope you will enjoy making the comics.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

My manner-o-meter tells me that I probably should not enter this contest, since I hosted the last one, and I will undeniably win. So unless a rabbit flies out of my colon, I just want to say that the choice of judges is superb.

Manners? We ain't got no manners. We don't know nothing about no manners. WE DON'T NEED NO STINKING MANNERS!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

BTC #5: An Obvious Joke With a Kosher Twist by AtheistDiary 5-15-04

I killed Kenny. Then did his taxes. Jew BASTARD.

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"AthiestDiary, you rock." - MikeyG (I'm LOVED! HOORAH!)

Yeah, you're right, I don't got no stinkin' manners. But I do have a rabbit flying out of my colon, so let's get stripping!

Product Placement Ahoy by possums 5-15-04

Hey... Leroy... I kinda sold our souls for a Delectible Hostess Twinkieâ„¢. You WHAT?!! I mean, even though I can resist a tasty fun time treat like a Hostess Twinkieâ„¢, did you really have to sell our souls for it?!?! I bring you tidings, and strife! You BASTARD!

I meant to say "can't resist." There's an apostrophe and a t, you just can't see it.

You BASTARD: The Musical by possums 5-15-04

o/ B is for bundt cake that I will never eat! A is for an asshole that I will surely beat! o/ o/ S is for sandwich, of the nuckle variety! T is for tuberculosis in my mother's knee! o/ o/ A is for antelopes a-grazing at the zoo! R is for really stinky smell of monkey poo! o/ o/ And D is for dystopian disasterpieces of Delawaaaaare.... o/ o/ You BASTARD. o/

BTC #5: He Hungers by Gabu 5-15-04

Hey. I'm sorry, but I must confess: I was the one who murdered your entire family, burnt your house down, and just now got you fired from this job. Oh. Well, no problem. I also ate the last donut in the break room. You BASTARD.

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Blue is the color of victory.

Noonie and Dagmar are also judging? There's no way I could win THIS one. Crikey.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

BTC #5: I Am Lazy by Rabid_Weasle 5-16-04

I'll give you five bucks to call me a bastard. You BASTARD!

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Poop.

Dont let the fact that I'm judging deter you (can't say the same for my sis though). I'm going to be fair about this.

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I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

BTC-stuck in your head by xxausrottenxx 5-16-04

pour some sugar on me, in the name of love hmm hmm hmmmm on me you BASTARD!

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xx( o Y o. )xx

!!

I wouldn't put silly grudges that you think I have in the way of something like this. And to tell you the truth, I have nothing against you, Mikey.

BTC #5: No Really ... You're a Bastard by AtheistDiary 5-16-04

... they were hiding behind the Deep Space 9 exhibit, but she'd had too many Klingon Koctails. So my mother never could remember who the guy on top of her was that was yelling "MAKE IT SO! MAKE IT SO!" You BASTARD.

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"AthiestDiary, you rock." - MikeyG (I'm LOVED! HOORAH!)

BTC 5: Storytime by maddog00 5-17-04

Yeah, so I snuck into the room and it was all dark. And there she was, lying there...just waiting for it. Spread eagle and everything. Oo, man, its gettin' good...then what. I left. You BASTARD.

BTC 5: Storytime 2 by maddog00 5-17-04

Seriously, I really gave her the time of her life. Awesome. Do you even know who it was. Your mom. You BASTARD.

BTC 5: Uncreative Bastard by maddog00 5-17-04

Hi   Hi  You BASTARD.

BTC5: Fun with Dictionary Definitions by UnknownEric 5-17-04

Hey. What are you doing for Father's Day this year. I'm taking my dad to the ballgame and then a nudie bar. How about you? I was born out of wedlock and don't know my father. You BASTARD.

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I has a flavor!

BTC 5: My Legitimate Son's First Comic by umfumdisi 5-17-04

a  868,fr e   c   ;yis9kj i8ij in bbn g nh jiuhgyvy You BASTARD.

Not bad for six months old, eh?

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Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

BTC5: Four letter word for snatch by maddog00 5-17-04

I'm doing this crossword. Three letter word for 'not me' and a seven letter word for 'illegitimate child.' Hmmm. Think of it yet? Shut up, I'm thinking. Hmmm. Ah. You BASTARD.

BTC 5: My Legitimate Entry by umfumdisi 5-17-04

Hey, Perm, did you see that part in the "Friends" finale when they... SHUT UP! ..... I had to tape it because I was out of town, and I haven't had a chance to watch yet. They all drink the Kool-Aid. You BASTARD.

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Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

BTC 5: Will Cooler Heads Prevail? by kaufman 5-17-04

I changed the background. YOU BASTARD!

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

BTC #5 : Tomorrow, Tomorrow... by niteowl 5-17-04

You really don't remember what happened at the party last night? Nope. I was pretty drunk, you know. We dressed you up and took pictures. You're pretty damn cute as Little Orphan Annie. You BASTARD.

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

Okay, I switched the position of the two guys in the last panel, but I had to, because otherwise it wouldn't read properly (I added a rebuttal). We'll just assume there's another water cooler on the wall opposite the first one. Yeah, that's it.

BTC V - Kinda A True Story, But I Couldn't Use My Avatar by r2_d2 5-18-04

So last month was my parents' anniversary. But I missed it, because I thought they were married two months before I was born, but it was actually two months and a week. You BASTARD. Not quite.

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BTC5 (1): My Daughter Asked About You... by Shadow_Artist 5-18-04

I'm in a bit of a rush. Could you make sure your dad gets these files? Sure thing! Wow dad, your business partner is so hot! Say, do you think if I asked nicely, he'd let me have wild horny sex with him? I'll ask tomorrow, but I wouldn't hold your breath. Jeff is ashamed of his tiny penis. Besides, I think he's a homosexual. You BASTARD.

BTC5 (2): Never Stand Up A Nerd... by Shadow_Artist 5-18-04

You missed our last Dungeons and Dragons game! Don't worry though, I let some kid in a white baseball cap play your character. That's cool. So, what crazy treasure and skills did 'Norman the Barbarian Fishmonger' pick up while I was away? Can I set myself on fire? Sure. You scream as your flesh is slowly burnt away. As you die a dwarf runs into your shop and steals all your salmon. You BASTARD.

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Carry the battle to them. Don't let them bring it to you. Put them on the defensive. And don't ever apologize for anything. - Harry S Truman, 33rd president of US (1884 - 1972)

BTC 5: Introductions. by kaufman 5-18-04

Me TARZAN. You JANE. You CHEETAH. You BASTARD.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

BTC #5: It takes a minute. by SheMonsterO 5-18-04

How did my mother die, her heart was always strong.... She died of a broken heart. Your wife ran away with the handyman. night passes.... Wait a minute. He's the only handyman in town. You BASTARD.

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FIRETIGER: SheMonsterO

Here's my two cents.

BTC #5: Simplicity by codehappykid 5-19-04

Last night, I slept with your wife and stole all your credit cards. In addition, I put cyanide in your SuperCup. You BASTARD.

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HALPUU!

The strip that everyone can appreciate:

Either go straight from Panel 1 to Panel 3, or skip Panel 1 and start with Panel 2.

BTC V - Choose Your Own Adventure by r2_d2 5-19-04

Just pick your preferred first panel: Panel A: Nov. 2, 2004: I just voted for Bush! or, Panel B: Nov. 2, 2004: I just voted for Kerry! You BASTARD!

Or, if you're like myself, take all three.

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